For all that Stiles can talk when it comes to saying something that matters words seem to fail him. When he has to look someone in the eyes and tell them something important he stutters and trips over words, can’t find the right ones and feels a bit like an idiot. It’s not necessarily easier to write what he wants to say down but at least that way he’s not stumbling over words and making an ass out of himself. So he writes what he wants to say down. There’s not many words, it’s not some sprawling, eloquent, epic of a confessions. It’s just a few sentences but they mean a lot and he hopes that comes through.
He drives across town, talking himself out of it and back into it no less than ten times in the times it takes to reach Derek’s loft. Derek’s car in there and Stiles kind of wishes it wasn’t, then it would be easier to drop the note and run. He has to talk himself back into going through with it. Stiles runs up the stairs to the loft and stuffs the note under the door as quickly as he can before turning on his heel and running back down the stairs. he hears the door open before he’s even reached the sixth step and his name by the time he hit’s the ninth but he doesn’t stop or turn back. Derek will read the note but Stiles can’t be there when he does. They’ll talk about it later, after Stiles tells himself a thousand more times that it’ll be fine if Derek says no.
He’s really hoping for a yes though and knows it won’t really be fine if it’s a no.
Derek just catches a glimpse of Stiles’ back when he opens the door. Derek calls out to him but Stiles doesn’t turn back or stop and Derek’s more than a little confused. Derek looks down at the folded piece of paper Stiles had slid under the door and bends down to pick it up. He unfolds it and reads what’s written on it.
we might not have met under the best circumstances and it might not of been love, or even like, at first sight but i’d like to think we formed a bond (i mean i did save your life a few times). that i became someone you could, and wanted to, trust. someone who could be there for you. and while we’ve been through some things i wish had never happened i know you don’t hold it against me, but still i’m sorry.
but i hope that inspite of, or maybe because of, everything when you look at me you see someone that you could love.
Derek re-reads it several times, not quite believing what he’s read. Derek looks at the hand holding the note and then at the one hanging by his side. Five fingers on both. Derek still isn’t sure this isn’t a dream. Stiles loves him.
Derek doesn’t even shut the door before he runs down the steps.
Stiles hasn’t even been home for ten minutes, his heart rate has barely slowed, when there’s someone pounding on the front door. Stiles knows its Derek, though he wasn’t expecting him this soon. Stiles takes a deep breath, trying to brace himself for the worst, and opens the door. Derek’s standing there with Stiles’ note still clutched in his hand.
“I do,” Derek says quickly.
“You do what?” Stiles asks, wanting clarification. He does know what Derek is talking about but he still needs to know for certain.
“I do love you,” Derek replies “I don’t look at you and see someone I could love because I already do.” They just stare at each other after Derek finishes speaking. Stiles doesn’t know what to say, he knows he should say something but he’s looking right at Derek and this is important and he can’t find the right words in his brain. So instead of saying anything Stiles just surges forward and kind of smashes his lips against Derek’s. Derek is still for a few seconds but soon enough he responds and it actually becomes a kiss. Derek’s hands frame Stiles’ face and Stiles moves his own hands and pushes his fingers into Derek’s hair.
When they pull apart Stiles is smiling and so is Derek, which only makes Stiles smile wider. Derek looks so goddamn happy and, to be cliché, his smile is blindingly brilliant.
“I love you,” Stiles says finally and it feels really good to say that out loud and know it’s reciprocated.
“I love you too,” Derek says and Stiles decides hearing Derek say it feels even better.